rock bottom - not yet
“The only good thing about hitting rock bottom is that it can't get any worse. When you hit rock bottom, you have nowhere to go but up.”
Starting new year of 2016 with a state of high temperature. Basically, a super high fever of 38.8 degrees for 5 days. I was so zoned out by it that I couldn't focus properly even after I've recovered. And I was still in the mourning stage for my dearest companion that just left me on that Christmas day.
My head was dizzy for the following weekend that I couldn't sit down at dinner without having the urge of wanting to puke. Not to mention that my lovely monthly period decided to visit me during my fever days, everything is simply just
swell. I'd like to believe it's could have been because all the bad things that has happened recently, it is just detoxing all the "negative energy" from within.
// Don't get lost amidst of everything, I tell myself. Pick up your knees and push. Push a little bit harder and farther. Don't push your heart, as it won't heal as fast. Though, push deeper because you could love again.
Always remember, not always where you must be but where you will need to be. On a lookout, at the beach or maybe even just near the windows or sit on a bench at the park. Think about a place where you share your mornings and nights. Think about the lazy days, holding hands and even the kisses. Push yourself to think of the new things, the new days and not compare it to the old. Think about what will make your loved ones' days better. Even your own days better.
I cannot be anymore grateful for my dearest sister, family, boyfriend and best friends that has been there for me and each other throughout the sad & depressing period at the end of 2015.
Don't forget to fill up the hole or crack in your heart. With respect & love for yourself and the people around who have made you. Trust yourself and eventually through the way you think, feel, you will learn more and make yourself proud. Be proud of yourself. Live and also through the struggle, don't forget to enjoy it and run till you're tired.
Don't get lost.
“I am strong because I've been weak. I am fearless because I've been afraid. I am wise because I've been foolish.”